Effective Agreements

Life is an ongoing process of creating agreements with others. An effective agreement means more than getting another person to do what you want. It means a true commitment from both people.

Successful Agreements

Your overall effectiveness in making and honoring agreements is greatly increased if you pay attention to three important elements:

  1. Clarify your personal values.
  2. Clarify your Vision as an individual.
  3. Clarify your Vision and Purpose as a Couple.

These three pieces will provide a strong foundation from which to commit to your agreements and achieve more consistent and satisfying results.

The Road Map for Success

Success is an almost certainty when both partners keep their agreements. Success is certainly at risk if one person doesn’t keep his or her agreements.

Most couples have hopes and dreams, and desires and expectations. They establish goals and make commitments that are developed from a joint visioning process; a process that expresses an inclusive vision of desired outcomes; their road map to success!

Another way to look at this is that we join forces with others by forming agreements. Agreements are expressed in writing or verbally during very intentional conversations. Most of us have never learned how to craft effective, explicit agreements. It is a skill we were never taught, even though it is fundamental to all relationships and a basic life skill.

Ask yourself:

  • Are you a committed couple who is strengthening your bond and deepening your intimacy and trust day-by-day and year-by-year?
  • Are you engaging in meaningful family and work relationships and friendships, and asking for what you want, saying your real yes and your real no and hearing others who may be asking you for something?
  • Are you crafting agreements consciously and with intention?
  • Do you expect others to honor their agreements and commitments and do you intend to honor yours?

Whether you are a committed couple or an amazing singleton, as they call it in the UK, let’s educate ourselves about agreements, commitments, boundaries, conflict, and fidelity. Let’s start risking being our deepest most magnificent selves! Join me and let’s start today!

Remember, only YOU can make it happen!


Original Content by Jackie Black, Ph.D., BCC
www.DrJackieBlack.com ~ DrJackie@DrJackieBlack.com
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